Many women claim that men only want that one and only thing. They don’t disapprove of the fact that men do indeed want that particular thing and think about it a great deal. Rather they’re making a statement about the hopelessly primitive condition of male sexuality.
Some day’s men don’t think about anything else. Round breasts, moist lips, nice asses, great legs, sensual gestures, exciting clothes and sexy shoes, kissing, feeling, flirting, having sex, sucking, licking and more. Glorious male simplicity! That’s why the statement “men only think about one thing” comes closer to the truth than the statement “men only want one thing.”
But women are also often preoccupied with the subject for days on end. Love, eroticism and sex are also the main theme in a woman’s thoughts and actions. The evidence can be seen all around us. All that sex and love in movies, clips, soaps, glossies, on billboards, in songs and art is definitely not only meant for men.
The difference in complexity is easiest illustrated by examining the male and female orgasm. I have never met a woman who came as quickly as I do, or one who was over her arousal as fast. In that regard, there is an important difference between female and male sexuality, in general, and between male and female orgasm, in particular. This important difference, which causes most of the battle between men and women, is, however, not a biological but a sociological factor.
In practical terms, women need a longer running start to reach a climax; they enjoy it longer
and come down more slowly. Men shoot up like a rocket and throw themselves from the highest peak into the abyss, end of story.
Orgasm is less important to women than for men—at least, that is general wisdom. But would that still be the case if men were to study the female orgasm more closely? What if men actually knew how to get a woman faster and higher up the ladder of sexual arousal? In short, women find orgasms less important because they know a lot of men can’t get them there.
On the other hand, the majority of women are incapable of properly exploring the male body. Many women limit themselves to that one erogenous zone dangling like a wobbly storefront sign between a man’s legs. It is generally assumed that after puberty a man’s erotic feelings concentrate only in that one spot. In that regard, men have hardly made any progress despite the sexual revolution. I have as many erogenous zones as the average woman, and I’m no exception. However, those zones have to be discovered, cherished and exploited.
Of course, it is true that in general simply having sex satisfies men more than it does women. Modern society has developed sufficient phenomena to meet that need. Porn, whores and other commercial services only confirm the image of man’s simple sexuality. But one cannot conclude, therefore, that men only want one thing. In the last analysis, men and women alike want only one thing: ultimate intimacy, maximum trust. And the deed is sometimes part of the deal.